02-12-2016, 10:34 AM
I was 8 yrs old when I made my first pass at a boy. Even at a young age I wanted to be a girl. But my family would have gone thru the ceiling if I said I was Gay, Bi or if I told them I like to wear women clothes. So I had lied to myself family and friends that I was straight even my wife until I told her after 20 yrs of marriage that I was Bi. She said sure you are what makes you think that. I took a deep breath and the words came out. I explained to her how I always had feelings for Guys. I told her that I was unable to express who I was sexually and it was time to come out.At least with her. She explained that crossdressing was fine as long as when she came home I was not dressed as a women and if you want to be with a man then I have a problem with that. Strange that we had not had sex for months and even then I told her if you don't want to have sex then I will need to go outside to have it. Because I have needs. At one point it was OK that during sex I could wear lingerie. I don't know what changed was it me or her or both but there was a wall inbetween us and we were not having sex anymore. I know she is using toys I find them around the room. I have made comments how we are both taking care of ourselves so why don't we share the moment. When we do have sex it is the same thing a little rubbing she rolls over pound her ass and were done. See I would love just to get dressed as a women and enjoy her from head to toe but that wont happen. Now I have joined a Cross-dressing dating site and I have met a very nice Lady there. She helps me with my clothes so I don't look like a slut even thou that was my look I was going for. Jerrie explained that if I want to feel more like a women then I needed to dress more conservative. Now I'm looking for more appropriate clothes and I feel so much better now that I get dressed at home and put street clothes over them and go to stores dressed as a women under my clothes. I never thought that I would ever be able to do this and the reason I can is for Jerrie she has gave me so much good advise. Now I need to figure out what I want to wear to go shopping then I just throw some baggie clothes on and out the door I go. But even now I am back in the closet again to only come out when Jerrie and I get together. That's my saving grace that I have her to talk to and laugh with but I still want more what that is I don't know yet in time I may love you all Sindy