A Journey.....

[Ryan]

I don't know if you could call this a journey or an experience. Ive been crossdressing on and off for about 30 years, going through the feelings, the emotions. The thought of "what if?" It's like a vicious cycle. Well not all vicious, seeing as I've enjoyed what I'm doing, crossdressing. Even now, I sit here typing, wearing the fishnet stockings that I bought from JC last month. Crossdressing has always been apart of me, and I'm not planning on giving it up. I believe that I've found myself. I found myself a long time ago, I just have to have the courage to admit it to myself without reservation. And then admit it to the ones I love. I don't want to hide, living a secret. I want to feel confortable with myself and my life.
I'm tired of being scared and in fear.

I'm happy. I'm being me, being myself. But I can be happier. I know that I can.

[Nicole]

Hello Rian,

Well congrats on being able to accept who/what you are… that was a VERY LONG journey for me. One that I wish I would have had the courage to have accepted decades sooner. Damn, I was soooo much more attractive back in my 20-30's… now I am 64 and look the part of an old lady! lol Though Roxy and Bunny do a beautiful job with my makeup.

While I sit here typing this to you, I take comfort knowing and feeling the weight of my silicone breasts nestled comfortably within my pocket bra. :-)

Yes, revealing myself to my eldest daughter and also my closest friend and their acceptance was quite a tension reliever… I would encourage you to be prepared for the worst… just in case and to have an expectation of how you believe that might make you feel. I can only say that I was quite worried about my daughter's reaction and quite relieved with her overwhelming acceptance and her acknowledgement that she sort of suspected… I guess that I tend to sit in a more feminine fashion and my hand gestures, she said, were a bit suspect to. lol My friend was much easier as I have known for quite a few years that he is gay. However my wife, son and other daughter and even my parents… I have no plans to reveal myself to them. They all give off a vibe and I just don't want to experience that rejection. :-( But given that, I can honestly say that since my limited reveal I am now enjoying much more Nicole time in that I now am able to go out with my daughter and my friend and experience a night out within the local LGBT community.

Okay, sorry… I tend to get chatty… this is enoug for now… just some of my thoughts

Hugs,
Nicole