02-13-2021, 05:49 AM
Hi. I'm still 99% in the closet about my femme side.
It was hard enough for myself to accept me, so I'm not sure how those around me will react to my secret.
I don't know how to tell my girlfriend that i desire to wear sexy dresses, heels, and makeup. I know she loves me, and i even believe that she would be fine with everything, but i also feel like maybe Raquel and my girlfriend are not as compatible as i am with my girlfriend... like i don't want them to meet. I don't really want that outside influence concerning how i do my makeup or hair. Maybe when i dress as Raquel I'm even more independent and bitchy than my male self, and i don't want to nurture another girl.
Is there a way to keep these two worlds from colliding?
I don't know if I've changed, or what's changing. But i am growing tired of fighting it. It feels so good to do what i want... but, in secret
The more i accept my femme side and imagine living as a woman, the more time i want to spend as Raquel, doing things that she enjoys and improving her.
So i can only be THIS MYSELF in secret. That is hard. And i feel ashamed to be so scared of others' small-minded opinions and judgements.
i love reading about Janet's experiences, and the other girls' journeys to femininity. Knowing that others go through some of these feelings is what inspires me to continue imagining who i truly desire to be.
I fantasize about what my first time dressed-up and going out could be like. I really want to make that happen. What a thrill to just dive in one night.
It was hard enough for myself to accept me, so I'm not sure how those around me will react to my secret.
I don't know how to tell my girlfriend that i desire to wear sexy dresses, heels, and makeup. I know she loves me, and i even believe that she would be fine with everything, but i also feel like maybe Raquel and my girlfriend are not as compatible as i am with my girlfriend... like i don't want them to meet. I don't really want that outside influence concerning how i do my makeup or hair. Maybe when i dress as Raquel I'm even more independent and bitchy than my male self, and i don't want to nurture another girl.
Is there a way to keep these two worlds from colliding?
I don't know if I've changed, or what's changing. But i am growing tired of fighting it. It feels so good to do what i want... but, in secret
The more i accept my femme side and imagine living as a woman, the more time i want to spend as Raquel, doing things that she enjoys and improving her.
So i can only be THIS MYSELF in secret. That is hard. And i feel ashamed to be so scared of others' small-minded opinions and judgements.
i love reading about Janet's experiences, and the other girls' journeys to femininity. Knowing that others go through some of these feelings is what inspires me to continue imagining who i truly desire to be.
I fantasize about what my first time dressed-up and going out could be like. I really want to make that happen. What a thrill to just dive in one night.