I guess I should tell everyone my beginnings...
As a kid I used to raid my parents closet and I'd try on my mothers clothes and wigs as much as I could. As I grew up, I could sometimes fit into my sisters as well. That sister was a HUGE tomboy, and by the time I was around 10-12, I was openly saying I wished she and I could change genders. We'd both be happier. That was in the mid to late 70's.
As I grew into adulthood, I really missed the opportunity to dress, so much so, that when I'd go home to visit, I'd sneak into my younger sisters room and try on their clothes while they were out. I eventually started buying pieces and makeup here and there and would dress at home when I was alone. I was dying to try going out dressed, but I was petrified! I was married and had kids by then and my wife was totally turned off by it all.
Finally about 12 years ago or so, I couldn't handle it anymore and began seeing a therapist and was diagnosed as transgender. My wife threatened to leave me, with the kids due to it and so, I again caved in and put my true self back in the closet.
Come 2015, all of my kids had finally grown up and moved out. Just my wife and I lived at home. The desire grew intensely to the point that by summer, I was in a deep depression and crying daily. Thoughts of wanting to end it all became an almost daily occurrence. By October, I'd found out more info, about the Transgender Services at U of M, About Janet's Closet and about Transgender issues in general.
The 3rd week of October had found me having talked to U of M, having joined a support group, and ready for the big moment of coming back out of the closet and telling my wife. I made an appointment for makeup at Janet's Closet, packed my bag with some clothes and headed up there from my home in Ohio.
Roxi was extremely kind to me and helped me pick out an outfit from my clothes, select a wig and do my makeup. On my way home, I had my nails done at a small nail salon and went home and confronted my wife in full "Jirra" mode. It didn't go well, but it hasn't stopped me.
I've since been out (dressed) to the Detroit TG Invasion in November, I've found a therapist and drive back and forth dressed to those appointments, and to the support group and just recently, spent a full week during my time off work at the holidays as Jirra 24/7! I finally found an inner peace that I never had before! I was able to spend time as the REAL me!
After that week, I had an appointment with my therapist and a psychiatrist. I was approved for HRT! I went to my PCP and his office referred me to an Endocrinologist! Hopefully I can get in soon! I've pulled the paperwork for my Legal Name Change and for my Gender Change on my Drivers License (Possible in Ohio!) I'm hoping to fully transition by Easter 2016!
My wife is totally against this all, and stated that we will not survive as a married couple (after over 27 years) due to this if I continue towards transition. But, I have to be true to myself. I've waited nearly 50 years to be the real me! And I waited until the kids were grown, and on their own. Time to be true to myself.
I know I still have a hard, long journey ahead... and I want to thank everyone who's helped me so far, and those who will in the future. And to Roxi and everyone at Janet's Closet! They've helped me make it this far and I will be there for things in the future too!
To everyone else... Be true to yourself. You deserve it and can only make your life more rich and full!
As a kid I used to raid my parents closet and I'd try on my mothers clothes and wigs as much as I could. As I grew up, I could sometimes fit into my sisters as well. That sister was a HUGE tomboy, and by the time I was around 10-12, I was openly saying I wished she and I could change genders. We'd both be happier. That was in the mid to late 70's.
As I grew into adulthood, I really missed the opportunity to dress, so much so, that when I'd go home to visit, I'd sneak into my younger sisters room and try on their clothes while they were out. I eventually started buying pieces and makeup here and there and would dress at home when I was alone. I was dying to try going out dressed, but I was petrified! I was married and had kids by then and my wife was totally turned off by it all.
Finally about 12 years ago or so, I couldn't handle it anymore and began seeing a therapist and was diagnosed as transgender. My wife threatened to leave me, with the kids due to it and so, I again caved in and put my true self back in the closet.
Come 2015, all of my kids had finally grown up and moved out. Just my wife and I lived at home. The desire grew intensely to the point that by summer, I was in a deep depression and crying daily. Thoughts of wanting to end it all became an almost daily occurrence. By October, I'd found out more info, about the Transgender Services at U of M, About Janet's Closet and about Transgender issues in general.
The 3rd week of October had found me having talked to U of M, having joined a support group, and ready for the big moment of coming back out of the closet and telling my wife. I made an appointment for makeup at Janet's Closet, packed my bag with some clothes and headed up there from my home in Ohio.
Roxi was extremely kind to me and helped me pick out an outfit from my clothes, select a wig and do my makeup. On my way home, I had my nails done at a small nail salon and went home and confronted my wife in full "Jirra" mode. It didn't go well, but it hasn't stopped me.
I've since been out (dressed) to the Detroit TG Invasion in November, I've found a therapist and drive back and forth dressed to those appointments, and to the support group and just recently, spent a full week during my time off work at the holidays as Jirra 24/7! I finally found an inner peace that I never had before! I was able to spend time as the REAL me!
After that week, I had an appointment with my therapist and a psychiatrist. I was approved for HRT! I went to my PCP and his office referred me to an Endocrinologist! Hopefully I can get in soon! I've pulled the paperwork for my Legal Name Change and for my Gender Change on my Drivers License (Possible in Ohio!) I'm hoping to fully transition by Easter 2016!
My wife is totally against this all, and stated that we will not survive as a married couple (after over 27 years) due to this if I continue towards transition. But, I have to be true to myself. I've waited nearly 50 years to be the real me! And I waited until the kids were grown, and on their own. Time to be true to myself.
I know I still have a hard, long journey ahead... and I want to thank everyone who's helped me so far, and those who will in the future. And to Roxi and everyone at Janet's Closet! They've helped me make it this far and I will be there for things in the future too!
To everyone else... Be true to yourself. You deserve it and can only make your life more rich and full!