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My first time sharing with anyone....
#1

Hello all, this is my first post.  I have been dressing since I was about 12.  Yes, it started with mom's things!  I was getting my introduction to sex though an older male cousin.  Not the healthiest thing for a 10 year old to experience but I have come to accept it for what it was.  I am not sure if the drive to dress was a result of that happening but certainly added to the confusion of my adolescence.  Many of my early masturbation fantasies were a complex combination of forced feminization (others forcing me to dress and be a submissive girl) and being a lesbian.  Once my cork popped I would feel very ashamed and embarrassed with a tremendous amount of guilt even though I was the only one that knew any of this. But the cycle would repeat almost every time I was aroused and the most intense orgasms were almost always related to being feminized.  Over time I evolved into a "normal" traditional adult life but still harbored the c-dressing gene.  I know she would never understand and she has never suspected any of my CD experiences or what thoughts go with them.


I really enjoy the feeling of women's clothing and obviously, based on what I've already shared, find it very arousing.  I don't usually look in a mirror when I dress up.   I've tried to do the make up thing a few times but it didn't work.  I have facial hair and my wife would not like me to shave it.  I would like to do full on make-up and hair some day but...


I have had the urge to step out and share this with someone else.  I am not sure what that means.  It has been stuck inside me for so long.  Maybe I just need to let it out in a SAFE and TRUSTING situation where someone else would not judge it.  Not sure if that is virtually or maybe in person.


I guess that is a lot to share for a "hi I am new" note.  My wife is away for a few days and I am considering shopping and playing out my urge to dress again.


hope to chat with others... curious to know if others had any similar childhood experiences that influenced their behaviors today?


Ree


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#2
Welcome to the forum, and the larger world!
Enjoy your time here, and good fortune in your journey!
Before you can love another, you HAVE to love yourself first
I aim to misbehave
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#3

(05-06-2021, 10:47 PM)JodieLynne Wrote: Welcome to the forum, and the larger world!
Enjoy your time here, and good fortune in your journey!


My first response!  It was exhilarating to see that someone responded to me first posting.  I have held this in for so long... I wasn't sure if anyone would respond and but I was sure if they did I was going to be chastised for something I wrote.  Thanks for a simple welcome, it was exactly what I needed! 

Redheads are always the fun ones!  Thanks JodieLynne, you were the first step on my journey.

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#4
Hello Ree! I'm also new to this forum. If you ever want to chat, don't hesitate to send a private message. It's pretty exciting and comforting to know that there are other people in the world that share similar feelings and situations.

xo
Joey
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#5
Ree -

Alot of people willing to listen here - welcome.

Weightlifter Daddy
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#6
(05-07-2021, 06:29 AM)Myster-Ree Wrote:

(05-06-2021, 10:47 PM)JodieLynne Wrote: Welcome to the forum, and the larger world!
Enjoy your time here, and good fortune in your journey!


My first response!  It was exhilarating to see that someone responded to me first posting.  I have held this in for so long... I wasn't sure if anyone would respond and but I was sure if they did I was going to be chastised for something I wrote.  Thanks for a simple welcome, it was exactly what I needed! 

Redheads are always the fun ones!  Thanks JodieLynne, you were the first step on my journey.


I'm very happy that my simple words brought you joy!

And to you, and anyone who needs a friendly ear, I am available to listen and offer my meagre advice. Smile

Regards
Jodie
Before you can love another, you HAVE to love yourself first
I aim to misbehave
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#7
Hello Myster Ree. I am sorry I wasn't on line and didn't see your post till tonight. I hope you had a good time whilst your wife was away.

My story has a lot similarities to yours. I too started with my Mom's things about 12, dressed from time time in my teens, then the home situation changed and it was virtually impossible to get the kind of privacy I needed to dress up. The strange thing was I didn't really miss it as by then I was in my later teens, cars and girls were a big part of my life.
The early dressing was often quite sexual, not always though, and I also a few subby experiences from older kids, though I consider myself a swtich, but am more and more sub as time goes on.
At the time I thought I must be the only one who felt like this, and like you, usually felt guilty after the release, and I remember saying I'd never do it again. We all know that never happens!
Also around that time I read an article in the paper, one of the "Dear Abby" columns, where a wife was writing in as she had discovered her husband liked to dress up in women's clothes. That was the first time I'd heard of the TV expression, and in part I still remember her reply, she said, they may be hetro, but normal they aren't. All this seriously horrified me as I thought I had to be some kind of terrible pervert. This was during the 60's, so understanding and acceptance was rather nill for any kind of alt, or non binary lifestyle as we call it now.

I started dressing again a few years after getting married, as of course my wife the usual array of lingerie which became irresistable! This went for years till a few years ago and I felt the pull so strong to be very feminine. Nice clothes, makeup, the whole nine yards.
Years earlier again like yourself I had a full beard most of my life, and wondered what it be like to shave and do makeup!
I finally did it just a couple of years ago, and I'm never going back. Only one person is left alive now who knew me before I had the beard, but I didn't tell him the real reason for shaving!

I hope this hasn't been tmi for you. PM me if you want to chat sometime.
Amy
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