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Hello :)
#1
Like many of you, I have been crossdressing since I was 15 years old, first with my sister's clothes but the feeling of having my own stuff was growing inside me but since I was living with my family I could not buy anything. After I finished college and started to work, finally I could buy my first dress, bra, and panties the feeling was awesome!! but another problem in my life is that I've always had girlfriends and I like women a lot, and I decided no more crossdressing and o threw all my clothes Sad 

After a few years, I decided to buy again boots, dress, heels, etc and occasionally crossdressed every time that I could and had time. I really enjoyed those days alone in my house dressed but never went out. 

Now I moved to Detroit and started living with my girlfriend, so I had to get rid of all my stuff Sad I was really hard but since I want to be with her, she would never understand it and I love her. Sometimes I dress with her clothes when she is out of town but for me is really difficult to have my own stuff in the house, last time I bought some booties that I kept in my car for more than 6 months until I threw them to the trash, I cannot live with the feeling that maybe one day she can find them. 

I was looking at some pictures and I found some pictures when I dressed, I will attach them hopefully you like them. 
I would like to find a friend that can keep my stuff in secret and someday get dressed together. 

I'm too shy and I do not know if I could go to Janets for a full transformation, I would love to but my fear is greater.


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#2
Fran, there is no way I would tell you to do or not do something, as I do not know what the dynamics are between you and your girlfriend are; but damn babe, you are hot. With a body and look like in your pictures, I'd be out there turning head and dropping jaws. I wish we could post higher resolution pics on here, because a close inspection of yours would certainly show heat rising above you on each picture! Hugs, Michelle Heart Heart
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#3
Hey, Fran!  Welcome to Janet's!

I know what you're going through - been there most of my life.  Although, I've never had a steady girlfriend in the mix.  I myself am probably leaning towards being gay (I am what you may call "questioning".)

What I can say is that I have found help and support through an LGBTQ Community Center about 40-mins from where I live.  Our Center has peer-support groups that meet. I go to the Men's (Gay) group and the Transgender group.  Being around Transgender People is a big help in me dealing with my cross-dressing.

It's never easy to keep a big secret like this from your loved ones.  I'm pushing 50 and my family & friends still don't know.  At some point, I am going to have to tell them because keeping the secret, and having so limited access to what I feel inside I want to do, is affecting my mental and physical health.  But I've been dealing with this for many years.  Hardest thing that any Trans person (from "closet  cross-dressers" to Transsexuals) is the fear of rejection and loss of loved ones when and if they find out.  Unfortunately, out of all the LGBTQ Community, Transgender People have the highest rate of suicide in the community.   I am grateful and so thankful I have "The Loft" LGBTQ Community Center.

Don't mean to be a downer - just sharing my own experience.  LGBTQ Community Centers are a great refuge.  There may even be specifically a Transgender facility in your area you can go to.  I think that NY City has one that (for a fee) you can join and they have lockers for one to store their "Femme Stuff" so you don't need to keep them hidden at home.  Things to research in your area.

BTW, you look FABULOUS in those pics!
~ Maria
HeartT.G.I.F. (Thank Goodness I'm Femme!) 

"Loneliness, a constant friend and lover I know well..."
('One Step Closer' by Asia)

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#4
Hi Fran,
I don't know if this is your first post here but if it is....Welcome to Janets Closet.

Regarding your pics...WOW...you look fabulous in your outfits.   You look beautiful.  I wish we could see your face...I would love to see you with makeup but I understand the fear of being outed if someone recognized you.  If I may briefly speak to that....IMO, it is extremely doubtful that someone you know is going to come to the forum to search for you.  Unless that person also crossdresses or if you outed yourself to someone, how will anyone know that you are here?  Initially I had the same fear but came to realize that no one I know is looking for me so with confidence I gladly post pictures of myself.  Here's hoping some day you get the same confidence.

Regarding the girlfriend situation, my opinion is that the sooner you come out about your dressing, the better off you will be.  I am also a member at www.crossdresserheaven.com and I have read many stories of people who have come out to their wife or girlfriend.  In the cases where they come out to their wives, the situation is always worse because the wife always feels betrayed.  In the cases I've read where they come out to girlfriends, in some cases the girlfriend accepted it (some just tolerated it but didn't want to see it...others embraced the dressing and became helpful dressing companions)It's better for both of you if you come out while you are in the boyfriend/girlfriend stage.  That way, she doesn't feel betrayed and you have the opportunity to be open to her.  If she accepts your dressing, you are in a great situation as you can continue your dressing (the urge NEVER goes away), and if she is really supportive, she might help you out with shopping for clothes and help you with makeup.  If you stay hidden, you will always be hidden and living in fear that you will be found out some day.  Then the fear causes you to purge your stuff and that gets to be expensive besides the continued frustration of being limited with the dressing.  I don't know how long you have been together.  A week, a month, several months....after some time, hopefully you have had enough conversations to get a feel for how she thinks.   I mean, if you found out she's an evangelist, mmmmm, chances are she'll never accept dressing.  But if she has socially liberal feelings, chances are she'll be more accepting.  Maybe you kind of ease her into this...."I recently came across this article about men who like to dress as women.  I thought they were gay, but they're not...they just like to wear womens clothes occasionally.  Could you imagine anyone doing that?"   Her response might surprise you.   At least you might have an idea of how she might react if you come out about dressing.....help you figure out where your relationship is headed.   Of course, it's up to you to ultimately decide if love is blossoming and you want your relationship to go to a whole new level.   Just remember, the urge to dress NEVER goes away.  I wish you the best as you figure this out.
Heart 
Anne
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#5
(04-05-2019, 06:03 AM)MichelleL Wrote: Fran, there is no way I would tell you to do or not do something, as I do not know what the dynamics are between you and your girlfriend are; but damn babe, you are hot. With a body and look like in your pictures, I'd be out there turning head and dropping jaws. I wish we could post higher resolution pics on here, because a close inspection of yours would certainly show heat rising above you on each picture! Hugs, Michelle Heart Heart

Thanks Michelle, I wish to have better pictures, these are at least 3 years old.

(04-05-2019, 06:26 AM)LM-Maria Wrote: Hey, Fran!  Welcome to Janet's!

I know what you're going through - been there most of my life.  Although, I've never had a steady girlfriend in the mix.  I myself am probably leaning towards being gay (I am what you may call "questioning".)

What I can say is that I have found help and support through an LGBTQ Community Center about 40-mins from where I live.  Our Center has peer-support groups that meet. I go to the Men's (Gay) group and the Transgender group.  Being around Transgender People is a big help in me dealing with my cross-dressing.

It's never easy to keep a big secret like this from your loved ones.  I'm pushing 50 and my family & friends still don't know.  At some point, I am going to have to tell them because keeping the secret, and having so limited access to what I feel inside I want to do, is affecting my mental and physical health.  But I've been dealing with this for many years.  Hardest thing that any Trans person (from "closet  cross-dressers" to Transsexuals) is the fear of rejection and loss of loved ones when and if they find out.  Unfortunately, out of all the LGBTQ Community, Transgender People have the highest rate of suicide in the community.   I am grateful and so thankful I have "The Loft" LGBTQ Community Center.

Don't mean to be a downer - just sharing my own experience.  LGBTQ Community Centers are a great refuge.  There may even be specifically a Transgender facility in your area you can go to.  I think that NY City has one that (for a fee) you can join and they have lockers for one to store their "Femme Stuff" so you don't need to keep them hidden at home.  Things to research in your area.

BTW, you look FABULOUS in those pics!
Hello Maria, that sounds great but at this moment I do not know what to do, maybe that can be an option to deal with myself and as you said it's no easy to keep the secret. Thanks a lot for the advice.

(04-05-2019, 07:19 AM)Anne Wrote: Hi Fran,
I don't know if this is your first post here but if it is....Welcome to Janets Closet.

Regarding your pics...WOW...you look fabulous in your outfits.   You look beautiful.  I wish we could see your face...I would love to see you with makeup but I understand the fear of being outed if someone recognized you.  If I may briefly speak to that....IMO, it is extremely doubtful that someone you know is going to come to the forum to search for you.  Unless that person also crossdresses or if you outed yourself to someone, how will anyone know that you are here?  Initially I had the same fear but came to realize that no one I know is looking for me so with confidence I gladly post pictures of myself.  Here's hoping some day you get the same confidence.

Regarding the girlfriend situation, my opinion is that the sooner you come out about your dressing, the better off you will be.  I am also a member at www.crossdresserheaven.com and I have read many stories of people who have come out to their wife or girlfriend.  In the cases where they come out to their wives, the situation is always worse because the wife always feels betrayed.  In the cases I've read where they come out to girlfriends, in some cases the girlfriend accepted it (some just tolerated it but didn't want to see it...others embraced the dressing and became helpful dressing companions)It's better for both of you if you come out while you are in the boyfriend/girlfriend stage.  That way, she doesn't feel betrayed and you have the opportunity to be open to her.  If she accepts your dressing, you are in a great situation as you can continue your dressing (the urge NEVER goes away), and if she is really supportive, she might help you out with shopping for clothes and help you with makeup.  If you stay hidden, you will always be hidden and living in fear that you will be found out some day.  Then the fear causes you to purge your stuff and that gets to be expensive besides the continued frustration of being limited with the dressing.  I don't know how long you have been together.  A week, a month, several months....after some time, hopefully you have had enough conversations to get a feel for how she thinks.   I mean, if you found out she's an evangelist, mmmmm, chances are she'll never accept dressing.  But if she has socially liberal feelings, chances are she'll be more accepting.  Maybe you kind of ease her into this...."I recently came across this article about men who like to dress as women.  I thought they were gay, but they're not...they just like to wear womens clothes occasionally.  Could you imagine anyone doing that?"   Her response might surprise you.   At least you might have an idea of how she might react if you come out about dressing.....help you figure out where your relationship is headed.   Of course, it's up to you to ultimately decide if love is blossoming and you want your relationship to go to a whole new level.   Just remember, the urge to dress NEVER goes away.  I wish you the best as you figure this out.

Thanks Anne, you are right, the urge  never goes away and that's why when she is out i dressed with her clothes, one thing that I know is that she is open mind but you never know, maybe she says that but deep inside her she thinks other things, right? I do not know maybe one day i will have this conversation with her. 

Regarding the pics, I had bear and no make up that's why i hid my face, one day i want to go to Janet's to do a transformation and I will post some pictures. Smile
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#6
I love the photos! You are very sexy and hot hot hot! I hope you can find some peace with yourself and emerge as the.beautiful person you are!
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