Maria in NY

[LM-Maria]

Maria,
I think it would be great if you celebrate with us here when you hit 5 lb goals.  Since you are 214.5, let us know when you hit 209.5  (sounds better than 210, yes?).  But when you do, let us know how you are rewarding yourself.  Not a food reward...that sets you back.  But do you want to buy a bra or other piece of clothing?  Shall it be lipstick in a particular color?  eyeshadow?   If you have any questions about these things, we have many people here to lend their advice.  Best wishes....sounds like you have yourself headed in the right direction.

Oh, thank you Anne!  The only reward I need right now is that - the weight is going DOWN!  I feel better knowing I'm getting down in size.  If I can get down close to my ideal weight, and STAY there (develop good, lasting habits), I may look into cosmetic surgery to remove the "excess" skin (as I lose the weight, my skin is looking "baggy").  I know a couple of natural-born women who, after losing so much weight, had surgery to remove the excess skin and they look amazing!  You'd NEVER guessed they were ever that large once in their life!

Although, I would LOVE to start building up my "closet" (i.e. lingerie, dresses, blouses, ladies pants, stockings, wigs, padding, makeup, etc., etc.), I have no place where I live right now to STORE them all without people I don't want to know, knowing what I'm doing!

Please all reading, don't judge, but I happen to live with my Mom - got into a situation where I now have to carry a mortgage on HER home (I really don't want to talk about it - it is what it is, a BAD decision I made with my sibling years ago and now I'm stuck!) and she has indicated that she doesn't want me to leave because she doesn't want to be alone (my Father, her husband, is deceased).  HOWEVER, I really, REALLY don't want her to know right now that I'm a cross-dresser (and potentially gay or bisexual).

IDEALLY... I'd LOVE to find an "out"/experienced cross-dresser or transvestite in a reasonable commute distance from where I live to function as a "base of operation" address to send "Maria care-packages" from Janet's Closet (or from the myriad of plus-size women's clothing online retailers I've found and bookmarked).  That way, I'd have a place, and an experienced friend, to practice feminizing myself until I'm confident in my dressing and female "acting" to go out in public - and ultimately break the news to my family who I truly am.  If I'm going to do this thing, if I'm going to "make it real", I want to go "all the way" and be out!

I may get ostracized from my old friends and my family, but if I build enough relationships within the LGBTQ community, I will have new friends and "family" to turn to.  That's my goal.

Fantasy/Dream ideal situation: Find a nice, sweet, caring and hard/smart working (need to make the money!) guy, who will love me - male or female - who I can move in with, and we live out our lives as a couple.  Heck, for someone like that, I'd even consider marrying him (or the close proximity "domestic partnership" thing available to same-sex partners - unless this country FINALLY would allow me to marry someone I love.... y'know, "Life, Liberty, and THE PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS"?)

BUT.... I can't bank on THAT happening!  So, any potential male suitor would have to allow me to be feminine, and be good with me in lingerie, teddies/night gowns (bedroom/intimacy) or just wearing women's attire - best would be him being turned ON by that!  Oh, what a dreamy guy that would be! heeeheeeheeeheee!!!

[Anne]

Hi Maria,
Yes, storage can be an issue if you are living with someone whom you do not wish to see your fem items.
As for a ship to location, please be aware that if you have items shipped via Fedex to a Fedex location, most (if not all) will receive your package and hold it for 5 days for you to pick up at no charge.  Check with your local Fedex store if they charge for receiving and holding it for you.  I do this with a Fedex store near me.   So you will ship it to:

Fedex
Attn: your name
Fedex store address

If you ship via UPS, there are retail locations that serve as UPS dropoff points.  I have a local hardware store that will receive UPS shipments and hold it for me at no charge until I pick it up.  You will need to contact UPS to find out if there are any retail locations near you that serve as a UPS dropoff.  These retail locations typically charge nothing for this because their motivation is to get you into their store and buy stuff.  You can also have stuff shipped via UPS to your attention like above to a UPS location/UPS Store but I believe there is a charge for doing this so you will want to contact them in advance to find out how much is that charge.